Dear friends and family, loved ones,

Remember the importance of taking 10.000 steps a day that I talked about in my last letter? When I was in Holland , I bought a ‘step counter’, or a ‘pedometer’ as they are officially called. It’s a small gadget you clip onto your trousers. It feels the vibrations of each step you take, and keeps an accurate account of how much you walk in the course of a day. Amazing little gadget. Remember this; I will get back to it.

Apart from buying a pedometer, in the few weeks I spent in Holland (after having lived in West Afrika for ten years and before coming to India) I started really looking forward to living there for a couple of years after my stay in India. And I feel quite confident that my next posting will be in Holland , though of course you never know. So I have been half looking at apartments to get an idea of what is available, and even planning my daily schedule (waking time, meditation time, walking time, how to organize cooking, housework and shopping…). However, now I find myself thinking how to retire from working life as soon as possible and come and live here at the ashram for the rest of my life… I just feel so joyful all day long.

I suppose this is not going to last. I am quite aware that even though I have set up a daily schedule that I am following to a fair degree (more on my schedule in the next letter it think) and I take part in the collective chores, I do not (yet) have any real tasks and responsibilities. So even though it sometimes feels like I am ‘working’ (quite hard actually; my legs hurt from sitting so much), I know I’m not. Swami Veda Bharati, my teacher, is expected tonight, and he may well drastically change the rhythm I have established. Pandit Ananta is arriving tomorrow, with a load of translation work for me to do. Also, winter has not yet started. I do not thrive in cold weather, so this perfect summer weather is obviously contributing to my bliss in a large degree.

However, I hope my practices have something to do with this joyous feeling too. But what is also wonderful is the way obstacles just seem to remove themselves. I will give you an example. I arrived on Monday (October 23), and thought I would go into town and do some shopping on Tuesday, so as to settle down completely as soon as possible. I wanted an electric water kettle, a mug and a thermos for in my room (I do not drink black tea and brought some herbal teas with me), a water bottle (to carry filtered water from the dining room to my cottage), a broom to clean my cottage, and perhaps a blanket to wrap myself in for meditation. But I did not at all feel like leaving the ashram. So I did not go on Tuesday. Mañana…

On Wednesday, we went to Sadhana Mandir to take part in special ceremonies on the occasion of the tenth anniversary of the ‘maha samadhi’ of Swami Rama. Sadhana Mandir is the ‘mother ashram’ so to speak, created by Swami Rama, my teacher’s teacher. When Sadhana Mandir became too small for the number of people arriving and the projects Swami Veda had in his head and heart, Swami Veda built another ashram not far away. He is the spiritual director of both. Samadhi is the state of union with the Supreme Consciousness (you can call it God or use any other word you choose), a state which spiritually highly evolved people can obtain during meditation – or even maintain at all times - and which the most evolved enter upon death (except in Yoga we would not call it death but ‘leaving’ or ‘dropping the body’. Our true nature being eternal, the body becomes like old clothes we do not need anymore, and just leave behind at a certain moment).

So, in the context of Swami Rama’s leaving the body (13 November 1996), a ‘yajna’ was to be conducted, a ritual with fragrant herbs being offered into a fire while chanting sacred texts. Its effects are highly purificatory on many levels. We were going to be there in the morning, so I decided I would do my shopping after lunch. I still did not feel like it, but better get it done with.

I felt uplifted by sitting in on the ceremonies, and as we walked home (2900 steps, 25 minutes) I felt even more joyful than before. I was walking along the Ganga (or Ganges, the holy river) together with some of the Brahmachari (young celibates living under the teacher), when one of them asked me if I would like to take a dip. THEY obviously wanted to. And so did I. I had not brought any swimming gear or towel of course, but bathing suits are not used anyway for this sort of occasion.

So I took off my waist pouch with passport and the likes (since you are obliged to carry identification in Holland, I feel I might as well do it abroad), my mala (a kind of rosary used in the yoga tradition), my teva’s (sturdy sandals, very comfortable for walking), and my little back pack with my water bottle and my ‘seat’ (for meditation; a light weight firm pillow to slightly elevate the hips off the floor when sitting), and proceeded into the water. Gangais a glacial river, and even at the end of summer, the water is cold. As I mentioned before, I do not thrive in the cold, but on former occasions I have taken dips in the Ganga and found it very invigorating. Even so, it was an advantage to have to keep my clothes on for the sake of decency…

“Dive, dive!”, said two brahmachari who staid at a safe distance from Ganga, while I gingerly put my feet in, then my wrists, and then, painstakingly slowly, moved down the steps (all along Ganga there are ‘Ghats’, long steps going into the river to facilitate its access and the dips). Every step that I went in, I had to wait for my breath to return to normal. But in the end I did take a sort of dive and when my breath was more or less calm, I took full dips (head under) for a whole lot of people: family, members of AHYM-Bénin (the yoga club back in Benin, which I co-founded) and of AHYM-Burkina Faso (the yoga club in Burkina Faso, where I was initiated into yoga by Idriss Ouédraogo, a marvelous teacher), and I do not remember for who else. Well, for Swami Veda of course, and for myself.

I felt marvelous. I suppose swimming in cold water is always exhilarating, but swimming in Gangais something different altogether. I can recommend it to anyone. But then what did I feel clipped onto my trousers? Indeed, my pedometer. It did not enjoy the dip even half as much as I did. I took it to the shore and gently laid it beside my stuff, but it seemed I needn’t be so gentle: it had obviously dropped the body… Oh well, tough. I already knew the number of steps from Swami Rama Sadhaka Grama (where I am staying) to Sadhana Mandir (2903), and of the tour around meditation hall, offices and bookstore (214). This was as good a beginning as any to practice vairagya, ‘detachment’, one of our main aims in spiritual life...

So we swam around for some twenty minutes, then headed back home for lunch. It was so hot that by the time we arrived at the ashram, my clothes were almost dry… We were a bit late, but it was not a problem. Food, by the way, is excellent. I had not so good memories of former visits, but there is a new cook, and food is now really very good. So much for my bet with a friend, that in the next six months he will stop smoking (at least three months before I come back) and I will lose 10 kilos. (I will though. You too!!!) Then, as I left the dining hall – half an hour later then I usually would have – Radhe Rani came up with a note for the information board that no one was to leave the ashram (except to go to Sadhana Mandir) during the 15 days the fire ceremonies would last… And I swear, I was just mentally preparing myself to go into town and do my shopping. Saved by the bell! I wondered if this meant I would eventually have to go at a more inconvenient time, but thought I’d just see how things went.

Yesterday (Monday), while having breakfast, Radhe Rani said someone had to go into town and could bring back things, if someone needed anything essential. I wondered if my needs were really essential, but as they were not frivolous, I decided to mention the number 1 item on my list: an electric water kettle. Oh, said Utta, who had come back from a holiday the day before, I have one in my room of someone who is not here right now. You can borrow it. Wonderful, I said, and volunteered desire number two: a mug. Yeah, she said, you can borrow his mug too. Wow, I said, that is really great, quickly volunteering wish number three: perhaps they can bring me a thermos from town? Oh, said Radhe Rani, I have one you can borrow. So, I said, trying not to look greedy (how can you not look greedy when you ARE?), the brahmachari’s use stainless steel pots with a handle. Could they bring me back one of those, to carry drinking water to my room?

Well, I suppose you can imagine the jokes going on at the table, where, seeing my greediness, people started enumerating the most fantastic things that might be brought back from town. And I do agree that there was a fair amount of kama(desire) on my part. But then again, though they were not things I could not live without, my desires were not extreme luxury either. Anyway, the end of the story is that now, without having gone to town, I have it all! Or will have it all rather, because I have not yet seen the electric kettle, the cup and the thermos. But they brought back a wonderful water pot (‘You look SO Indian’ someone said to me as I was proudly carrying water back to my room). And I just saw a broom standing in a hidden corner of my cottage. And the other day as I came home, my pedometer had resurrected spontaneously. And when I first arrived at the cottage, the hot water boiler was not working. I tried it a number of times and another student at the ashram came in and looked at it, and I assure you, it really was not working. But after all these wonderful things, before reporting to the office that it needed repair, I thought I’d check just once more, and it works! Has worked ever since! So you see, you just have to sit at the ashram and meditate, and all problems solve themselves! What else do I ever want to do in my life?

Wishing you love and peace,

Sonia

P.s. someone just knocked on my door and brought a kettle and a high tech insulating mug….
P.p.s. And Radhe Rani just brought me the thermos…